Friday, May 9, 2008

Cold Weather, You're Out

Dear Chicago:

I don't know what I did to piss you off, but I'm writing to let you know that I've absolutely had it with your attitude. I WILL NOT, no matter how cold, snowy or downright nasty you get, WILL NOT wear my down parka another minute until at least October. I refuse! You may have gotten the best of me this winter by jacking up my heating bills to over $200 each month, leaving permanent salt stains on all my clothes and shoes and halting my driving lessons with your "ice storms," but mark my words, frienemy, your frosty days are numbered.

Watch out Chicago. Because as soon as your cold snap ends, I will be out on your town with a vengance.


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